The Uncomfortable Party
Is there anything you can do to feel more comfortable at a party full of people you don’t know?
You’ve arrived at a party. It could be a cocktail party hosted by a friend or the office holiday party. Wherever you are, you don’t see anyone you know. The event is crowded and slightly warm. People are smiling at you and you’re smiling back. You’d prefer to leave, but you must stay for the sake of your friend/department/job. What should you do?
Alexander Technique to the rescue!
First, notice if your neck could release any tension. Once your neck is no longer so tight, you might notice a change in your breathing. This is a good sign! It means that something in your body has let go and created space where before there was compression. Next, let your head nod gently at the tip of your spine. Think of your spine lengthening like a string of pearls. Allow your knees to unlock and your feet to feel the support of the floor beneath them. Notice that you can even breathe into your back. The room is full of motion and sound but you are centered. Your inner poise presents as confidence. If you feel discomfort creeping in later, all you have to do is take a moment to return to these directions. Now you are ready to introduce yourself to the nearest group and enjoy a beverage and an appetizer.
Have a wonderful time!
Photo by Alasdair Elmes on Unsplash
Sitting in School
Is there anything we can do for a child who sits all day at school?
Photo by Michał Parzuchowski on Unsplash
When my daughter was in first grade, her teacher told me she wasn’t paying attention. My sweet girl who had gotten in trouble once during Kindergarten was now regularly getting in trouble for being inattentive. She had a wonderful teacher who liked her very much but she still struggled. There were many probable causes for her distraction:
First Grade was more serious than Kindergarten and class sizes had increased
There was less free time and more time spent sitting in chairs and on the floor learning lessons
Recess was 15 minutes
My daughter was small for her age and therefore her feet didn’t touch the floor when she sat in her chair
I could not do much about most of the things on that list, but I could help with the chair! I sent her to school with a yoga block and a sitting disk.
My daughter sat on the disk and put her feet on the yoga block. Within a day her teacher noticed a difference. Was she attentive all the time? Of course not, but there was an improvement. My daughter appreciated the change, too.
What happened?
Since her feet couldn’t reach the floor when she sat in her chair, she felt ungrounded. She did not have stability and she was constantly fighting the sensation sliding down in her seat. That alone would make it difficult to concentrate!
The sitting disk is an air-filled cushion that allows for mobility while sitting on a flat surface or chair. The disk helped my daughter get vestibular input by balancing and rebalancing in her seat. Even though she needed to remain seated for long stretches of time, she could still have a small amount of movement on the disk. The ability to move was subtle enough to not be a distraction to her teacher or her peers. We talk about this in the Alexander Technique: Having openness and freedom in your joints so that you move slightly even in stillness. We call it the “standing dance.” In this case it was a sitting dance.
The nice thing about the sitting disk was that my daughter could take it to the floor with her when the teacher was reading or teaching a lesson while the class sat on the rug. This is something Alexander teachers fret over--children sitting on the floor while the teacher sits in a chair or stands to use the board. This is because it can be difficult to have poise while sitting on the floor. Children will kneel to combat slouching but the teacher will ask them to sit “criss-cross-applesauce” so that the students behind them can see. So the students’ backs grow more rounded the longer they sit and their necks shorten as they look up from their hunched positions. A sitting disk raises their hips and gives them the support they need to have a lengthened posture for the duration of their time on the floor. Enabling them to maintain the length of their spines will allow them to breathe and move and be more open to learning.
It would be better if children were allowed to move more in school. Until that happens, they can use a sitting disk and study the Alexander Technique.
Is your child having difficulty sitting in school? Is desk too big or too small? Does the chair slant back? Is the seat curved and slippery? Is the chair connected to the desk? Is your left-handed child sitting in a right-handed desk? Is your child straining to see the board? There might be a simple solution. An Alexander lesson can be a helpful and quick way to solve your child’s discomfort.
Driving and the Alexander Technique
The Alexander Technique can provide you with ways to make driving less of a pain in the neck!
Are you 16 or older? Do you live in a suburb or rural area? Do you have places to go? Chances are, you drive! Have you thought about how you drive? If you’re sitting in a bucket seat, is your back shaped like a “C”? Is the headrest dictating where your head should be? Are your arms tired? Are you sore after a long trip?
You need to consider using the Alexander Technique!
The AT teaches about the head-neck-back relationship and how being conscious of your alignment can alleviate a lot of discomfort. Let’s explore that relationship:
Assuming you are seated, let your feet rest on the floor about hip width apart. Put your hands under your butt. Feel the bones pressing into your hands? Those are your sit bones. Slid your hands out from under your sit bones and see that they press into the chair just like they did your hands. Let your sit bones and feet form a strong base that allow your spine to lengthen. Let your hands rest lightly on your upper thighs. Let your eyes see the room and let your neck undo enough tension that your nose drops slightly. Breathe and look around. You are balanced and poised. You can lean, turn, and reach with minimal effort. You can breathe and have an awareness of what’s going on not only in front of you, but in your periphery and behind you.
Now that you know how to maintain your dynamic poise, let’s talk about how to experience more freedom of movement while driving. Spend some time just sitting in your car--while it’s parked--to try a few adjustments.
Is your seat tilted back? This might force your neck and head to jutt forward. Try straightening the seat slightly and notice the difference. Do you feel your sit bones beneath you? Is it easier to reach and turn towards the back seat? If yes, then this is a better seat position for you.
Are you sitting in a captain’s chair or bucket seat? These seats tend to encourage the pelvis to tilt back, forcing the spine to curve and the shoulders to slump. Try sitting on a cushion. If you don’t have something on hand that’s appropriate, you might try ordering a cushion. I have the embarassingly named “Tush Cush.”
You might want to try something like this.
Are you able to breathe more fully, reach, and turn in your seat? If so, then this is a good option for you.
3. Do you need to tilt your seat forward slightly? Give it a try and see if you are no longer
rolling back on your sit bones.
4. Now that you are more upright with a long spine and the freedom to breathe and move
more easily, you will want to adjust your mirrors and possibly the steering column.
Try this for a day or two and notice if you sense a difference? With any luck, you’ll feel more relaxed and less tired after a day in the car. Let me know how it goes!
This is the sort of activity an Alexander teacher can work on with you. If you are interested in trying a lesson, contact me!
